Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
