No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
My balls are so social today.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
My vagina is very pro this idea
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize