I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Randomize
