nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
