He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
