Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Randomize
