There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize
