ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Randomize
