you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
