You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
