Rock
Scissors
Fuck
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
Randomize
