East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
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