It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
this boner is exhausting
operation have a gay friend backfired
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Randomize