How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize