I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
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