Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
I just had sex on a roof
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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