yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
