Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Randomize
