At least make sure they are 18
Why
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Randomize
