The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Randomize
