So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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