they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
