I feel like abortions should bother me more
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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