Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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