True but thats because hes a fetus.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
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