Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
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