We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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