I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Randomize
