I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Randomize