Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
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