I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
