Duck Duck Cougar?
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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