I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
