you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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