well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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