Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I cannot find my penis.
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Randomize
