You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
Randomize
