Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
