i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
