Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
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