i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Randomize
