Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
My vagina is very pro this idea
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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