Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
