its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Randomize