She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
wow bdsm is so cute
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
Randomize
