Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
they're like a gay fantastic four
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
When are your genitals available?
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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