I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
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