You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Sext me about skeletons
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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