i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
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