Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
No stitches, just platelets and will power
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Randomize
