so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
Randomize
