a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
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